Category Archives: Writing

Identifying and Fighting Stress

Posted on March 5, 2014 | Leave a comment

I’m currently once again in a pitched battle with the demon STRESS. Over the years I have become very familiar with my old nemesis. Stress is the Moriarty to my Holmes, the Lex Luthor to my Superman, the Loki to my Thor. I chase him away or push him underground, perhaps force him to be my ally for a time*, but I never destroy him. To a certain extent he is a part of me, caused by me and given power by me, and to destroy him would be to destroy myself. But I have learned a few warning signs that he is plotting a Dormammu-like return and perfected a few tricks to get his evil genie back into the bottle.

Signs and Symptoms of Stress

I’m so used to stress that I don’t even notice it until I get physical symptoms like:

Canker sores (fever blisters or aphthous ulcers)
General malaise and lack of energy during workouts
Teeth grinding
Dry and gritty eyes
Loss of mental focus
Lack of creativity
Inability to sleep and/or non-restful sleep
Irritability
Blood pressure spikes (dizziness on standing or stooping)

Methods of Fighting Stress (in no particular order)

Contemplation, Meditation, and/or Prayer. Get yourself a good book on the subject and start your daily practice (just so happens I wrote a sturdy little booklet on the subject that’s available for your B&N Nook, for your iPad, or in universal formats here).
Vitamin D. You may be deficient, especially in the winter when you aren’t getting outside as much. You can overdose on Vitamin D, so follow package directions and do not supplement long term. Recent studies show that taking tons of vitamins may actually be more harmful than beneficial.
Eat healthy. Cut out the salt and processed foods, eat more green leafy veggies, and try eating liver once/week (not fried). Liver contains CoQ10 which lowers blood pressure and fights stress.
Watch the caffeine. Studies show that up to 5 cups of coffee a day may be good for you. What studies don’t show is that 5 cups of coffee a day can allow you to push harder and stay awake longer than you should. Go get some sleep and you might feel better.
Take your workouts down a notch. If you workout a lot like I do (four or more times per week) you may be over training. Everybody’s different of course, but when I get signs of stress I change one or two of my weekly workouts to a simple walk or hike. This keeps my metabolism up but also gives my body a chance to rebuild and recover. It also encourages me to…
Go outside. Build a fire in your fire bowl or chiminea and warm your toes while sipping some chamomile tea. Fly a kite with your kids. Take your dog to the park. As ‘kumbaya’ as it may sound, it is now an accepted fact that exposure to the natural world is nothing short of a cure-all. Seriously, this is a big stress-fighter. Undervalue the outdoors to your detriment.
Eliminate it at the source. As a martial artist I subscribe to the theory that it is impossible to fight more than one opponent at a time. If I’m attacked by three goons, I use position to make myself a less available target and then drop the smallest man first so that I’m fighting two instead of three. You are not Bruce Lee and this is not a movie. Stop dancing around and letting your stresses punish you. Identify your stresses and, starting with the lowest hanging fruit, begin getting rid of them altogether. *This is about the only time when stress is your friend: when fighting it forces you to actually fix what’s bothering you.
Use your head. Most stresses are mental — expectations and opinions of others, goals you want to hit but haven’t, self-criticism, etc. Can you actually, physically, materially touch what’s bothering you with your right index finger? If you can’t, then it’s largely imaginary, probably isn’t as bad as you think you it is, and needs to be put into better perspective. If you can touch it — let’s say it’s a dripping faucet, a nasty friend, a cheating lover, a bottle of vodka, etc. — take action to fix it, replace it, or get it out of your life.
Acknowledge the Head and Foot Paradox. Let’s say that when you’re stressed you bite your nails or call your toxic ex-boyfriend. If you can’t identify what’s stressing you out, start by stopping the nail biting. Put some red pepper sauce on your cuticles, take up knitting, chew gum, or what-have-you (or delete his contact info from your cell). Sometimes your head leads your feet, sometimes your feet lead your head. If you can’t change the direction your head is taking you, point your feet in another direction. Maybe your head will follow.

That’s all I got. Hope it helps. But whatever you do, do something before stress takes it’s toll.

Stress is no joke. If you are struggling with stress and nothing’s working, see your doctor. I’m not a doctor.

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Posted in Martial arts, Mysticism, Writing

Tagged stress

Introducing PTDICE — well, almost

Posted on March 3, 2014 | Leave a comment

I got so much traffic whenever I blogged about my homemade workout dice that I’ve decided to pursue marketing them. As of right now we are still working with manufacturers to get the best pricing and service, formatting packing and instructions, etc. but we hope to be on the market soon.

You can check out the new PTDICE (c) website here.

More to come…

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Posted in Martial arts, Writing

Tagged dice, ptdice, workout

I Believe Lee Marvin Coulda Kicked my Ass

Posted on February 28, 2014 | Leave a comment

Something has changed. Either I am outgrowing action movies and/or becoming a cranky Pat Hingle character, or modern action stars just don’t get it done.

Old school actors like Lee Marvin, Steve McQueen, and James Coburn could emote. When I watched them in an action movie, I could feel their aggression radiating from the screen and, as a martial artist, I know that it’s aggression that wins fights. I’m sorry Vin, but I haven’t thought “This dude could whip the snot out of me” since Pitch Black. With a few exceptions, these ‘youngsters’ just ain’t gettin it done.

Let me clarify. I know that Randy Couture could kick my ass. But when I sit down and watch him play Toll Road, I don’t believe that he could. I’m not talking about intellectual decision making, but rather the actor’s ability to evoke in the viewer the feeling of, “Damn, this guy means business.” I believe that Vince Majestyk could drag me through a knot-hole and leave me dying in the mud. Hawkeye? Not so much. It’s about the actor’s ability to suspend my disbelief for ninety minutes.

Maybe it’s the directing. Tarentino or Scorsese could transform David Spade into the scariest tough guy on two legs. Liam Neeson got it done as Bryan Mills in the first Taken. Costner got it done in The Bodyguard. Bruce Willis in the first Red. Denzel. Gary Oldman.

Is there anybody in movies right now who could make you feel the way Clint Eastwood or Gene Hackman used to? Gene Hackman. Gene Hackman. That guy made you feel like he would crunch the marrow from your pathetic little bones and then go rock your girlfriend’s world with your scalp hanging next to him on the bedpost.

Hugh Jackman? Gimme a break.

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Posted in Martial arts, Writing

Tagged action movies, hackman, oldman, tough guys

Hello Power and Such

Posted on February 21, 2014 | Leave a comment

People saying “Hello.” Please pardon my gender stereotypes.

Wednesday I wrote about the value of talking to people you run into at the market, convenience store, restaurant, and so forth. Then — what a coincidence — I saw a report on CNN about the Power of Hello and the negative impacts of loneliness.

Apparently Oprah is championing an initiative designed to encourage people to #justsayhello. Initiatives turn me off. “Initiative” is just a fancy word for “fad,” and fads come and go like the Snuggie and the Zone Diet. What I’d like to see is a steady reversal in the trend toward isolation. Or maybe a permanent revelation on the part of humankind that putting down cell phones and talking to folks in your actual vicinity is a wonderful thing.

I know, it’s a lot to ask, but look at the evidence. We already know the dangers of talking and texting while driving. Now we know that there are measurable negative health affects associated with loneliness and isolation. And that being isolated and self-absorbed (or phone-absorbed) you could even get shot:

“The San Francisco Police Department says that security footage reveals the alleged killer of a young man on a San Francisco light-rail train had his weapon out in plain sight, the San Francisco Chronicle reported. But what investigators found more alarming is that none of the other passengers noticed because they were staring at their phones.”

Here’s hoping at least a few of us change our ways for good.

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Posted in Mysticism, Writing

Tagged hello, isolation, loneliness, phones

Toss Out a Few Nuts

Posted on February 19, 2014 | 1 comment

Don’t know why I picked this sketch to go along with this post. I guess it just seemed to match the mood.

In his retirement my Pop started throwing peanuts to the squirrels. He’d stand at the back door and throw them way, way out there, back by the tree line.

Every week or so he’d put them a little less far out, maybe a foot. Before too long he was putting peanuts directly on the back stoop. He would sit there in his favorite chair and watch them eat, with nothing between them but the screen door. It didn’t matter how hot or how cold it was outside — he would prop open the old wood door, put the peanuts down, and watch them eat through the patched wire screen.

Eventually the day came when he could open the screen door just a crack, hold out a big fat peanut, and a squirrel would come and take it right out of his hand. I never tried the trick myself, but I remember the lesson.

Everywhere he went he talked to people. He talked to the cashier and the bag boy at the market, to the waitress at the restaurant, to the neighborhood kids, anybody with whom he crossed paths. When he died there was standing room only at the service. Even his dialysis nurse showed up. The two of them used to play lotto numbers together.

In the end, it was the same skill. He drew people in, throwing out the nuts a little closer each time until they ate out of his hand.

Seems to me we could all stand to toss out a few more nuts. The nuts aren’t the only things that end up coming out of their shells.

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Posted in Mysticism, Writing

Tagged nuts, pop, shell, squirrels

Guess who I met at Friendly’s?

Posted on February 13, 2014 | Leave a comment

The phone vibrated in my pocket. I ignored it. Only a couple of blocks stood between me and the ATM, and there’d be plenty of time to look at the phone once I was off the road. After I made my deposit I slid the truck between two painted white lines on the parking lot and checked the phone. It was a text from my wife asking me to swing through Friendly’s and get her a sundae. I shot back the OK, stowed the phone, and pulled out onto the dark street.

Friendly’s was quiet and there was no line at the counter. A young fellow in glasses with square black frames greeted me with a smile and asked for my order. He made a mistake while ringing me up and had to call for a void key. The manager, a pleasant lady with a name tag that read Debbie, completed the void and apologized for the delay.

“No worries, thanks Debbie,” I said. I looked at the young man as he began to ring me up again. “I’d call you by name too, but you’re not wearing your badge,” I said.

“Oh,” he said. “I’m not wearing it. If I was, good luck pronouncing it. I’m not proud of it.”

“Aw, come on man,” I said. “It can’t be that bad. What’s your name?”

He looked down as he tugged on gloves to make my wife’s sundae. “Jay-Quan,” he said. “I guess my mom’s just not that educated.”

“Hey look,” I said. “I’m Robert. When I was kid I went by Robbie, and the kids called me Snobbie, Slobbie, Gobbie, you name it. No matter what your name is, people will find a way to make fun of it. Who cares what people think? Your mom gave you that name with love.”

He looked up from his work, scooping out and packing ice cream into a paper dish. “I want you to put your name tag on, and I want you to wear it with pride,” I told him. “Let your light shine, and don’t let anybody, or anything, dim that light.”

“Thank you so much, so much. That was…” he hesitated. For a second I thought he might cry, but his face brightened. He smiled and blinked hard a few times. “Thank you so much. I needed to hear that. I mean it.”

“You’re very welcome.”

He handed me the sundae. “Hear you are Sir. Have a good night.”

“I will Jay-Quan, thanks. You too.”

I turned and went out the door. Inside the truck I checked my phone for messages, found none, and started the motor. The man on the radio said snow was coming. Like my advice to Jay-Quan, I wondered if it would stick.

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Posted in Writing

Tagged friendly's, ice cream, light, names

Self Defense vs. Dogs

Posted on February 10, 2014 | 2 comments

This is a small, harmless dog. Unfortunately, some dogs are large and scary.

Last Monday I went for an early morning walk. About dawn, going down a quiet residential street, I watched a happy suburban couple emerge from their home and bounce down four front porch steps toward an idling minivan. With them came two large black dogs, breed indistinguishable in the thin light. Neither animal was on a leash.

The dogs barked in deep bass that echoed off the houses and came toward me at full run.

This is not the first time I’ve had run-ins with dogs. Once, while on a late night run, a German shepherd jumped the fence of his enclosure and confronted me beneath a streetlight. Another time I was surrounded by a pack of feral dogs while walking near some dumpsters behind a warehouse. On one occasion, an apparently gentle dog, leashed by her smiling owner, bit me on the hand after I asked and was given permission to pet.

But the last attack, prior to this past Monday that is, was launched by a large Chow. It charged silently and, being a dog lover and a peaceful guy, I assumed it just wanted to play. My kindheartedness earned me a terrifying bite on the upper thigh before the owner pulled him off. It went for my groin. I turned and raised by knee to hide the target so the thigh is what she got. After the Chow, I vowed that if it ever happened again I would not hesitate. I’m a dog lover. But I swore that if there was a next time, I would bring all of my defensive skills to bear immediately, without hesitation, and not consign my fate the whimsy of a canine’s conscience.

So, as those two black shapes charged toward me, I deployed my tactical folding knife with 4 1/2″ locking blade, lowered my stance, and yelled involuntarily, “Jesus Christ!” followed by, “You better get ’em, ’cause I’m gonna kill ’em!”

The husband quickly seized one of the dogs, but the wife missed the second. She took off after it, yelling for it to come back. I turned my body and prepared to be ripped apart but not without a fight. I hammer gripped the knife in my right hand, point up, left foot forward to avoid getting my attacking arm locked in its jaws. I could hear my blood in my ears. Fifteen feet short of my position she managed to take hold of the second dog’s collar. It reared up on its hind legs, continuing to bark ferociously and nearly pulling her over.

“Sorry,” she said, as the dog began to settle down.

“Put your dogs on a leash,” I said. I folded and stowed my knife and walked home, glad nobody got hurt.

When I write about dog defense I do so with experience.

Defense vs. Dogs

When confronted by an untrained canine that is not charging, adopt a non-threatening stance. Don’t turn your back, run, or look away. If the animal doesn’t get bored with you and leave the area, utter commands like “Sit!” “Stay!” and “Down boy!” while maneuvering toward a building, vehicle, or other shelter. Lock eyes with the mutt and imagine tearing him to shreds like a stuffed animal. Trust me, this will deter all but the most highly trained and/or aggressive canines. Ever tried to swat a misbehaving dog? They are gone before you can get out of your chair. Dogs are empathic readers of body language.

If the animal is charging, arm your strong hand with a pocket knife, ballpoint pen, etc. Crouch slightly to lower your center of gravity and turn sideways to hide your groin, weak side forward, strong/armed hand to the rear. In my experience, dogs go for three primary targets: face/throat, genitals, or anus. Hold your weapon near your hip and tuck the forearm of your weak arm beneath your chin to protect your throat. Brace yourself. When it latches on, stab like hell.

Do not pull back from the bite — always push into bites, be they animal or human. If you have a light weapon (or none at all), strike downward at the eyes. If you have a pocket knife, slash upward at the throat and chest of the animal from beneath.

If you are yanked from your feet and overwhelmed, assume safety position. Curl into a ball to protect vital areas. Pull your knees to your chest, interlace your fingers behind your neck, pinch your elbows together to protect your face, and wait for help.

Good luck. You’re going to need it.