You Might be a Martial Artist if…

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My truck console contains mouthpiece, tactical folder, wooden training knife, medical tape, and hand sanitizer. This can only mean one thing…

I looked down at my truck console and realized that, if Nick Stokes and Sara Sidle found my truck abandoned in the desert, they would have no trouble figuring out what my “hobby” is.

Then again (it’s been there so long that it has faded into the background and I don’t even notice it) there’s a giant decal on the back window that would make the contents of the console insignificant.

Friends and family are painfully aware of my love/obsession with martial arts and self defense.  For example, during movies and TV shows, my wife tells me to stop critiquing the fight sequences and poor decisions of the main characters.  She and my daughter are sick and tired of me pointing to the screen and saying things like, “If that ever happens to you, what you should do is…”  It’s important for martial artists to remember that not everything is a teachable moment, and that sometimes less is more.

The truck decal in my rear window.

The truck decal in my rear window.

Anyway, all this got me into a Foxworthy-esque frame of mind…

  • If you joke about the fact that you should be wearing an ADVIL t-shirt — you might be a martial artist.
  • If your wash your hand wraps in the sink and leave them hanging the bathroom to dry like your grandma does her bras and underwear — you might be a martial artist.
  • If you feel the same way about Fight Club that Tom Hank’s character in You’ve Got Mail feels about The Godfather — you might be a martial artist.
  • If you’re at the grocery store and you run into one of the guys from the Physical Therapy Center and they know you by name — you might be a martial artist.

Got any of your own?  Post in the comments.

 

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2 responses to “You Might be a Martial Artist if…

  1. Patricia M. McGee

    If someone taps you on the shoulder and you have to fight the instinct to take them down…you might be a martial artist.

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