Category Archives: Writing

Hermetica Review, News, and Your WOD

Posted on March 11, 2016 | 5 comments

Last night I finished one of the best books I’ve read in recent memory.  Hermetica: The Greek Corpus Hermeticum and the Latin Asclepius in a New English Translation, with Notes and Introduction by Brian P. Copenhaver is the definitive translation of the Corpus Hermeticum, and  must read for any serious student of religion, mysticism, magic or philosophy.  Read my Goodreads review here, then go buy a copy here.

And today I hit a milestone — 2,000 book downloads!  I can’t believe that my stuff is this popular.  I mean, I can believe it.  It’s kind of a fact, and why shouldn’t I be able to attract 2,000 downloads?  I work hard and I take my craft seriously.  It’s just that, even if you assume some people have read more than one of my titles, there must be something like a thousand people reading my books.  No, it’s not that it’s unbelievable exactly, it just makes me a little woozy to be out in front of that many people.  And it makes me happy.  So I just want to say thanks to my readers for…

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Now here’s your Cabal Fang WOD.  You’re going to hate me for this one — when you get done you’ll be panting like a Labrador at a tennis ball chasing contest!

  • PTDICE: AMSAYC in 10 mins of 4 Hop/Clap Push-ups and 8 Jump Squats (I got 18 sets).
  • Rest 1 minute and then complete Grappling Conditioner #1 (If you’re unfamiliar, details here)
  • Rest 1 minute and then Bike or Run 6 x 3:00/1:00 (pace for the 3:00, sprint for the 1:00).

 

 

 

 

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“The Witch” is not What They Say It Is

Posted on February 28, 2016 | Leave a comment

[WARNING: This review contains spoilers!]

Director Robert Eggers debut film The Witch is getting a fair amount of attention.  It appears to be #4 in the box office and rave reviews are flooding in from many critics.

Everyday mortal viewers like myself, on the other hand, have been somewhat unforgiving.  Why?  Because although The Witch is creepy, weird, and unsettling, its problems are myriad.  The visuals are nice and its well acted.  It has several nice shocks and some genuinely disturbing scenes.  But the dialogue is period accurate for the 1600s, which means you can understand only two thirds of what’s said.  And the ending is incredibly dark, the darkest in recent memory.

The film is billed as a “New England fairy tale” and as everyone knows, fairy tales are lessons for children.  Little Red Riding Hood warns little girls about the dangers straying off the path of abstinence.  The Three Little Pigs encourages kids not to be lazy and to do things right the first time.  The Pancake warns kids that if you get sassy and run away from home before you’re ready, you might fall prey to greedy pigs.

What is the lesson taught by The Witch?  Some say it empowers women.

According to Vice Magazine, “The Witch is a kick in the balls of patriarchy.”  Jex Blackmore and her Satanic Temple have embraced the film saying,

“[I]t features a declaration of feminine independence that both provokes puritanical America and inspires a tradition of spiritual transgression. We are empowered by the narrative of The Witch: a story of pathological pride, old-world religious paradigms, and an outsider who grabs persecution by the horns. Efforts to oppress and demonize the heretic prove to be a path to destruction. The witch does not burn but rises up in the night.”

Really?  Did we watch the same movie?

Sure, it’s true that it accurately portrays  the patriarchal nightmare of puritanical early America.  Poor Thomasin, the movie’s young heroine, is trapped by her worthless father and mother in a horrid, dark, and oppressive home environment in which, although innocent of wrongdoing, she is continually blamed.  The evil witches abduct and kill her little brother Sam.  They lure away her other brother Caleb, whom they seduce, poison and kill.  These witches love to kill and mutilate stuff — dogs, goats, you name it.  Eventually they get around to slaughtering her two remaining siblings as well.

The film may kick patriarchy in the scrotum, but there’s no way out for our heroine.   In the end, after being forced to kill her own deluded mother in self-defense, Thomasin has no choice: in order to survive, she must sign her name in the book of another male authority figure.  Sure, this one can take the form of the goat and get you high in the woods, but it’s out of the frying pan and into the fire.  It’s not freedom.

Cheering at the ending of this movie is like cheering about a girl escaping from her oppressive parents into the arms of a gang of meth heads.  The Witch, with utter realism, says the same thing that every real life gangster, pusher, pimp and low-life scum has said since time began.

If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.

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Two Birds: Punishing Evildoers and Saving Money

Posted on February 17, 2016 | Leave a comment

As you may have heard, the residents of Flint, Michigan are in crisis after it was “discovered” that the water supply was tainted with lead, the bacteria that causes Legionaire’s Disease, highly carcinogenic TTHM, and other contaminants.  I put “discovered” inside quotes because residents had been complaining about brown, foul-smelling water for almost a year before the story broke.

If you haven’t read it about, please do so.  If you have read about it, I’m sure you agree that Governor Snyder and everyone involved in poisoning the residents of Flint should be forced to compete in the next Kyokushin Kumite (see example below).

While we wait on that, here’s what you can do:

  1. Don’t buy bottled water.  Ever.  Just stop it already.  It’s bad for the environment in a million ways.  Nestlé is pulling thousands of gallons an hour from the Michigan aquifer and we’re buying it.  It’s early yet, but stories are starting to break that Nestlé’s drain may have contributed to Flint’s change in water sources.  And, it turns out, Michigan Governor Rick Snyder’s wife is a spokesperson for Nestlé.
  2. Tap water is really safe in most places in the U.S.  Drink that instead.  Doing so will save you about $100/year.  But if you want to make sure your water isn’t “flinternated” don’t buy bottled water.  Get a filter for your sink or fridge, or get one of those pitcher things.  Pitcher and faucet filters cost about $8/month, so that’ll break you even.  Fridge filters are about $60/year, so you’ll save you $40/year.
  3. Want to do something more tangible to help Flint?  Here’s a page full of links.

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Faith vs. Works: Alchemy in The Walking Dead

Posted on February 16, 2016 | Leave a comment

“Faith without works is dead,” it says on the wall of the church in this past Sunday’s episode of The Walking Dead  (Season 6, Episode 9).

Together then, they are alive indeed.

To have faith is to look upward and trust in a power greater than oneself.  To take action is to look within, trust in yourself, and manifest your decision.  And so, to say that “Faith without works is dead” is to say that both are reliant upon one another.

Seal of Solomon

Action = Fire, it is the chemical symbol Delta (Δ) that means “change.”  Faith = Water, the cup, the exact reverse symbol (∇).  Together, transposed, you have the magic hexagram (image right).  The reconciliation of opposites is a powerful mystical doctrine.

The character of Rick Grimes in The Walking Dead isn’t as much trying to find his way between the extremes as he is trying to reconcile them, to bring them together.  I would argue that he is the epitome of the wise hermeticist — Solomon trying to build his Temple.

In order to do this he must look up and gather the blessings of the Above, then bring them down  and share them with the Below.   As it says in the Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus, a mainstay of modern Hermetic thought, “That which is Below corresponds to that which is Above, and that which is Above corresponds to that which is Below, to accomplish the miracles of the One Thing… It is the origin of All, the consecration of the Universe…It rises from Earth to Heaven and descends again to Earth, thereby combining within Itself the powers of both the Above and the Below.  Thus will you obtain the Glory of the Whole Universe.  All Obscurity will be clear to you.”

Rick Grimes, Alchemist. Sword, machete, ax — what’s the difference?

Father Gabriel Stokes is finally starting to learn this lesson, a lesson Rick has learned and is always re-learning, perfecting, and sublimating in true alchemical fashion.  This is why, despite all the failings and the frictions between Rick and Gabriel, Rick entrusts Judith to his care.  Rick can feel the change.

Once again Rick is right, because “All Obscurity will be clear to you.”  Gabriel picks up a machete and gets to work, with success.

And when Carl lies bleeding on the table, inches from death, what happens?  Rick looks at the place where his son’s right eye used to be and he “sees” what must be done. Again, as it says in the Emerald Tablet, “All Obscurity will be clear to you.”  The hawkish Carl has no such vision yet, but he yet may.

Rick has faith, and he knows that if he puts that faith into action he can motivate the people of Alexandria to overcome any foe.  He’s right.  They follow him and win.  With the fighting concluded, he sits with Carl and there he professes his faith in the vision of a world rebuilt.  Carl’s hand squeezing his is the promise of hope.

Is Seth Hoffman, writer of this episode, an alchemist or hermeticist?  I seriously doubt it.  But that doesn’t mean he didn’t produce something that is Hermetic Horror for sure.

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Blood on the Wallpaper (and your WOD)

Posted on February 11, 2016 | Leave a comment
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I use PTDICE (buy a set at PTDICE.com) and an assortment of homemade randomization tools to create workouts. Why do I do this? Because (a) I work out at 5:00 AM and it’s really hard to come up with workout ideas when you sill have crunchies in the corners of your eyes, and (b) as a martial artist I think it’s good for me to have to deal with the random crap that the world throws at me.

First your Cabal Fang WOD.  This is nothing on paper.  It only takes about 30 mins and my heart rate never got over 150.  And yet it was ridiculously hard for me.  I would love for somebody to try it and post their feelings.

  • Animal Tabata (16 x :20/:10, cycling through Crab Walk, Gorilla Walk, Mule Kicks, Monkey Rolls, 8 mins total)
  • PTDICE (4 sets to failure of Hindu Squats, Mtn. Climbers, Full Stop Push-ups, and Jackknifes)
  • Heavy Bag Boxing Power Drill (8x:30/:30.  Complete as  many max power shots as you can in :30, rest for :30, repeat.  8 Mins total).

And now for the rest of the story…

Sorry for the dramatic title, I just couldn’t resist.  I probably should’ve called this post, “Wallpaper in my Blood” but “Blood on the Wallpaper” is much more enticing.

Flashback.  When I was a kid my father used to run a small remodeling company on the side.  I started off young helping out around the shop, but as I got bigger I started taking on more responsibility.  One of the things I seemed to have a knack for was wallpapering.  By the time I was 17, Pop was sending me solo on wallpapering jobs in million dollar homes.  I probably shouldn’t be allowed to wallpaper a doghouse these days, but back then, I was the stuff.

Fade in.  Among my mother’s things I found her father’s business card.  Grandfather Naff passed away when I was a youngster, so I only met the man once.

Here’s his card.  As you can see, it says, “J. W. Naff — Exclusive Paperhanging.”

And so it goes…

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Shouts to Bryan, a Video and Some Stats

Posted on February 10, 2016 | Leave a comment

My Marketing Director (wait, isn’t that me?) just furnished me with these ridiculous statistics for 2015:

  • In 2015 I wrote 101,754 words, averaging 400 words per working day.
  • I spend 23,735 minutes — that’s over 395 hours or 16.5 days! — training in Cabal Fang Martial arts.
  • My average workout time was 78 minutes, and I practiced on average 5.84 days per week.

People ask me why I work and train so hard and how I stay motivated.  Many assume I’m trying to sell a million books and get rich.

The answer is that it’s easy to write and train when you love martial arts and you love people.  It’s easy when you want to change the world, when you want to change the path of Western martial arts, and when you’re trying to help people realize their dreams.

Maybe that’s why my Public Relations Manager (wait — that’s me!) says I should send a shout-out to Bryan in Toronto.  Yesterday Bryan ordered a set of PTDICE as well as a the complete Secret Pyramid Series of booklets.  He said he’s been following my blog for some time, and added that he liked my book The Calisthenics Codex which he gave a 5-star review on KOBO.  He said,

  ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
Get fit without the gimmicks. Functional fitness at its best. At home, on the road, or better yet – no tools or gimmicks required to do these workouts. Mitchell gives some of the science but keeps it real and practical. His breakdown for ability levels and suggestions on how to mix and match are excellent. His style is approachable and the photos make it foolproof.
BRYAN | FEBRUARY 09, 2016

Thanks Bryan!  Maybe you don’t believe it, so I’m going to say it again — people like you are why I write stuff.  Next time I’m in Toronto, I’m buying you dinner.  You made my week!

From the Editor in Chief of the Martial Arts Desk (hey, that’s me too!):

Check out this video.  I’m not sure yet how I feel about this whole trend toward movement coaches in MMA, but this exchange between Joe Rogan and Brendan Schaub is hilarious (warning — profane content).

 

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Two Books, a Movie, and your WOD Walk Into a Bar

Posted on February 9, 2016 | Leave a comment

Here’s a movie for you: Bone Tomahawk.  People are dismissively calling this a “Horror Western.”  It is a Western and it is Horror, but it has zero in common with something like the abysmal Jonah Hex.  This haunting period piece, complete with appropriate attire and spot-on dialogue, is touching, funny, eerie, and downright shocking.  Kurt Russell, Matthew Fox, Patrick Wilson, and a very endearing performance by Richard Jenkins.  IMDB gives it 7.1 stars, I say 7.5.

Right now I’m reading The Phenomenon of Man by Father Pierre Teilhard de Chardin.  It has been called both “the greatest spiritual book of the century” as well as “the quintessence of bad poetic science.”  Which is it?  Too soon to tell.  But so far it’s a little dry, and I suspect that is the fault of the translator rather than the author (Chardin wrote it in French).  I really wish my French was a bit stronger so I could read it in the language it was written.  Anyway, I’m hoping it will widen my perspective the same way that this next book did.

Haven’t read William Irwin Thompson’s incredible book The Time Falling Bodies Take to Light: Mythology, Sexuality and the Origins of Culture?  Get it and read it immediately.  I’ll give you one quote, probably the most popular:

“Because we have separated humanity from nature, subject from object, values from analysis, knowledge from myth, and universities from the universe, it is enormously difficult for anyone but a poet or a mystic to understand what is going on in the holistic and mythopoetic thought of Ice Age humanity. The very language we use to discuss the past speaks of tools, hunters, and men, when every statue and painting we discover cries out to us that this Ice Age humanity was a culture of art, the love of animals, and women.”

It will make you see the Universe, and humanity’s place within it, in an entirely different light.  Pure genius.

And here’s today’s CABAL FANG WOD — it’s the workout we did this past Saturday at the martial arts club.  Try to get this done in under 30 mins — we did, but just barely.

  • 240 Kicks.  Complete 20 with each leg of Coup de Pied Bas, Knee, Coup Italien, Side Kick, Roundhouse, Stamping Kick.
  • Constitutional.  Front Lunge (100), Diamond Push-ups (25), Legs up Crunches (50), Left Planks (60 secs), Right Plank (60 secs), Burpees (25), Pikes (25), Squats (100).

Why did I title this post the way I titled it?  As a reference to what was, in my opinion, the funniest commercial of Super Bowl 50 (looks like they gave up on using Roman numerals, or else it would have been Super Bowl L).

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Pot Luck: My Psychic Watch, Social Trees and WODs

Posted on February 4, 2016 | Leave a comment

Today’s post is a peculiar little potluck of nubbin ends.

Yesterday morning I got out my father’s watch and it gave me goosebumps.  Once a month or so I get out his watch and wear it when I want to look nice.  To my surprise, the watch had stopped at 5:05 AM.  This is the exact time that nurses went to check on my mother and found her to be deceased.   See photo set above.  You will see a photo of the watch and a screenshot of the bounced call where the nursing home tried to reach me a half hour later.  I don’t know what to say, so I’m moving on.

Tree Sketch '96

I sketched this tree on a lunch break back in 1996. Pentel Superball black ink on copy paper.

Also yesterday morning,  I read an article about Peter Wohlleben and his book The Hidden Life of Trees.  According the article,

“[T]rees in the forest are social beings. They can count, learn and remember; nurse sick neighbors; warn each other of danger by sending electrical signals across a fungal network known as the “Wood Wide Web”; and, for reasons unknown, keep the ancient stumps of long-felled companions alive for centuries by feeding them a sugar solution through their roots.”

 Amazing!  Said it before and I’ll say it again: trees are people too, treants are real, Druids had it right, and people who cut down trees because they don’t want to rake leaves should be pummeled about the head and shoulders with the handles of their axes.

Very very early yesterday morning I had a delightful workout.  Note:  Just because you don’t see a WOD post on this blog doesn’t mean I didn’t work out and/or that you can’t see what I’ve been doing.  My productivity log, which contains all my workouts, is a public Google Doc you can see here.

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I use PTDICE for workout inspiration and I take a picture of my dice to help me remember what I did. Just in case I forget before I get a chance to update my log.

Yesterday’s Cabal Fang WOD:¹

  • PTDICE² w/ #20 chain.  AMSAYC in 10 mins of 8 Full Stop Push-ups and 16 Squats (I finished 8 sets) with a 20 lb chain draped around your neck. Calisthenics are the shit.³
  • All-in Heavy Bag Drill.  Place one heavy bag on floor about 2 meters or 6 feet from a second, standing or hanging heavy bag.  Set timer for 8 x 2:00/1:00.  Start timer.  AMSAYC  of 10 max power shots to standing bag, 10 shots to floor bag from mount, lock and roll to bottom position, 10 more shots. Repeat until timer beeps.  Rest 1:00.  Do that 7 more times for a 23-minute sweat extravaganza (24 minutes if you count the final 1:00 rest, but why would you, because the workout is over at the end of Round 8, now isn’t it?)

FOOTNOTES:

  1. Cabal Fang is the martial art I founded in 2009 (check it out!) and “WOD” stands for “workout of the day.”
  2. PTDICE are for sale here.  Go get yourself some.
  3. If you like calisthenics, you might enjoy my Calisthenics eBook, The Calisthenics Codex (download it here in any format you like).  By the way,  it’s the #2 calisthenics eBook on Barnes & Noble.

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Jerry Lee’s “Last Man Standing”

Posted on February 3, 2016 | Leave a comment
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The cover of Jerry Lee Lewis’ “Last Man Standing”

My mother’s favorite recording artist was Jerry Lee Lewis.  I was raised hearing Jerry Lee on the stereo.  Lots and often.  So, although I’m not a massive fan, I’m still a fan.  I know his catalog very well, really love and can sing along with many of his songs, and respect him very much as an artist who helped define Rock’n’Roll and Country.

Mom passed away a couple of weeks ago, and in the cleaning up process I found a CD in her things — I had given it to her as a gift on her 78th birthday last year.  Mom’s health, and her move into an assisted living facility, had curtailed her ability to dance around with the music blaring, and she hadn’t been able to go out and shop or anything.  So, although the record came out in ’07, she had never heard it until I gave it to her last year — and neither had I until just the other day.

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From the CD Jacket of “Last Man Standing” this is the so-called “million dollar quartet.” From left: Jerry Lee Lewis, Carl Perkins, Elvis, and Johnny Cash.

The title of this record comes from the fact that, of the four great members of the “million dollar quartet” (see photo at left) only Jerry Lee remains alive today.  His double album The Session is an excellent record, a true milestone.  Last Man Standing is a call back to that collaborative achievement.

Only better.

This is a collection of duets with some of the greatest Rock’n’Roll, Blues, and Country artists ever to step in front of a microphone.  Take a look at the track listing below and see if you don’t see at least a few artists that you love.

Music is very subjective of course, but in my opinion, the only dog on the record is his duet with Kid Rock (they butcher the hell out of Honky Tonk Woman).  But overall, this is an excellent record.  This is Jerry Lee’s highest selling album to date, and that’s true for a reason.

Highly recommended.

Track Num Title/Credit/Length Duet with
1 Rock and Roll (John Paul Jones, John Bonham, James Patrick Page, Robert Plant) – 2:14 Jimmy Page
2 Before the Night Is Over (Benjamin Peters) – 3:39 B. B. King
3 Pink Cadillac (Bruce Springsteen) – 3:55 Bruce Springsteen
4 Evening Gown (Mick Jagger) – 3:57 Mick Jagger and Ron Wood
5 You Don’t Have to Go (James Matcher Reed) – 4:00 Neil Young
6 Twilight (Robbie Robertson and David Campbell) – 2:48 Robbie Robertson
7 Travelin’ Band (John Fogerty) – 2:01 John Fogerty
8 That Kind of Fool (Mack Vickery) – 4:14 Keith Richards
9 Sweet Little 16 (Chuck Berry) – 3:04 Ringo Starr
10 Just a Bummin’ Around (Pete Graves) – 2:43 Merle Haggard
11 Honky Tonk Woman (Jagger/Richards) – 2:21 Kid Rock
12 What’s Made Milwaukee Famous (Has Made a Loser Out of Me) (Glenn Sutton) – 2:39 Rod Stewart
13 Don’t Be Ashamed of Your Age (Cindy Walker, Bob Wills) – 1:59 George Jones
14 Couple More Years (Dennis Locorriere, Shel Silverstein) – 5:13 Willie Nelson
15 Old Glory (Paul Roberts, Shelby Darnell, Jerry Lee Lewis) – 2:05 Toby Keith
16 Trouble in Mind (Richard M. Jones) – 3:49 Eric Clapton
17 I Saw Her Standing There (John Lennon, Paul McCartney) – 2:21 Little Richard
18 Lost Highway (Leon Payne) – 2:59 Delaney Bramlett
19 Hadacohl Boogie (Bill Nettles) – 3:18 Buddy Guy
20 What Makes the Irish Heart Beat (Van Morrison) – 4:12 Don Henley
21 The Pilgrim Ch. 33 (Kris Kristofferson) – 3:00 Kris Kristofferson

 

 

 

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The Hand of Benediction

Posted on February 2, 2016 | 2 comments

Which hand do you use when blessing something — like crossing yourself, blessing a person or object, etc. — and how do you hold the fingers of said hand?  Why should anyone (especially me, since I’m not Catholic or Orthodox) even care?

Well, I have three reasons for seeking insight into this.  A) Very soon I expect to start pursuing some kind of certification for interfaith minister, so I feel I need to know this stuff.  B) I’m into Western Esotericism, I have rituals to do that include blessings and crosses, and I need to know how to hold my hand.  C) Western Esotericism involves pointing at stuff with wands and knives and stuff, and I really don’t like the symbolism.  I’d prefer to use a naked hand.

Use of the right hand seems to be pretty universal.  Finger position, must less so.

This is my left hand in benediction because I can’t operate a camera with my left hand.
An illustration of a Jewish High Priest from Smith’s Bible Dictionary. Looks like he’s using one finger.
An Assyrian priest-king from Smith’s Bible Dictionary. What is that, a “Karate chop?”
Check out Rasputin. He’s got some kind of claw action going on.

Wikipedia has an article on crossing yourself that provides some guidance, but I question the accuracy of the article.  They say that,

“In Russia, until the reforms of Patriarch Nikon in the 17th century, it was customary to make the sign of the cross with two fingers…The enforcement of the three-finger sign was one of the reasons for the schism with the Old Believers whose congregations continue to use the two-finger sign of the cross.”

And yet, if you look at Rasputin in the photo above, he looks like he’s doing some kind of modified tora guchi or Okinawan Karate tiger mouth strike.  Clearly not a two or three-fingered sign of benediction.

Most people I have seen crossing themselves use three fingers of their right hand, as if they are trying to pick up six grains of rice.   Why?  I have not a clue.  But, according to this article, the traditional hand of benediction in use by the Catholic Church today was invented because Pope Peter had nerve damage.

In the end, I don’t think it matters all that much, so I’m going with the relaxed-two-finger-point.  If anyone has reliable information on this topic, any salient input at all, even a strong opinion one way or the other, please comment below!

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